Let’s Talk Real Relationship Goals

Part 1 of the Relationship Series!

Engagement Photo taken by my Momma

All the time we hear the phrase “relationship goals” tossed around like a hot potato, and it’s usually in reference to a fleeting moment of something really cute, but will probably be forgotten about 15 minutes later. You know those quick Instagram videos that show about 10 seconds worth of a couple you’ve never even met doing something sweet like slow dancing somewhere really random? I’m sure you can picture exactly what I’m talking about.
Those are great, y’all, don’t get me wrong. I love it! BUT, have you ever stopped to think about what your own real and long term relationship goals might look like? Not just the 10 seconds of sweetness that makes you go, “Awwww… #relationshipgoals”.

Let’s talk about it.

1: Remind each other to drink water

What a weird relationship goal, right? Actually… it’s not as weird as it might initially seem. If you aren’t there in the relationship yet, try to get to a point where you regularly remind your partner to do things like drink water, take a five minute break, go for a walk, and they say the same to you. Guess what, friend, that is great “relationship goals”!
I get really awful headaches for various reasons, one of the things that causes that is sometimes I will get really busy with tasks and won’t stop what I’m doing to eat a meal (like a normal human should), which causes headaches. Well, Dylan recognizes the cause of them long before I do almost every single time. I’ll start getting a headache and he’ll say to me, “When is the last time you ate? Did you drink enough water today?”
Just be there and take care of each other in the simple ways. The lovey dovey is wonderful and cute, but a partnership filled with reminding one another to do the little things to keep healthy and sane — that is beautiful and built to last!

2: Be honest even when it’s difficult

This applies to every aspect of life, but especially in romantic relationships. Some people struggle with this more than others, and that’s okay! That’s why it is called a relationship goal. Goals aren’t meant to be easily attained they are meant to be worked for. If something is bothering you, then lay it out on the table. Think about it first, pray on it, write about it, do whatever you have to do, but do not under any circumstances sweep it under the rug. Overlooking issues now leads to hurt and resentment and Lord knows what else that you’ll just have to deal with later. Do not play hide and seek with your problems because eventually they will find you.

2.5: Addendum – Be honest about the good stuff too

Honesty doesn’t always have to be tricky. Be forthright with the positivity too! Don’t think that you are being weird by telling your partner a ton of positive and happy things that you saw, feel, or that you think about them. It’s not weird, it’s sweet! Attack the heck out of them with raw and honest love!

3: Talk. About. Everything.

Yes, I mean everything. Maybe not right out of the gate. If you’ve only been an official couple for a grand total of a week then don’t feel obligated to pour onto your boyfriend/girlfriend your entire life story + family tree + political beliefs + skeletons in the closet, etc.

(Or do it just like that! I know people who have talked about almost everything — their relationship is still in that sweet brand new stage — and the way they are talking about everything upfront and going about it is working out phenomenally.)

My point is, it doesn’t matter so much when you talk about all of that stuff it just matters that it happens. During our wedding planning process one of the things that Dylan and I have recently completed is premarital counselling. Throughout our sessions the counselor made it a point to tell us how impressed he was by all of the things that Dylan and I have already worked through and talked about on our own through the years. Honestly, up until then I thought the way we had talked about everything was common and normal, but the more people I spoke with about it the more I realized that not all couples talk about everything the way he and I always have. That being said: talk finances, talk religion, talk about sex, talk about family, talk about where you want to live long term, talk about dreams and fears, pet peeves, real pets, kids, bad life choices that you’re trying to change, EVERYTHING. I guarantee it pays off in the long run.

4: Now it’s your turn!

Comment below what your real relationship goals are. I’m looking forward to reading what you have to say!

Circa 2018 taken by my brother-in-law David

Thank you so much for stopping by! It means the world to me. If you enjoyed this post please share it on social media with your friends! While you’re here, feel free to have a look at some of my other posts and let me know what you think. Don’t forget to subscribe!
Have a fantastic day, friend!

Much Love,
Cass

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